And not what someone else told you to do…
Did you grow up with an extremely structured and regimented life?
Every day, you’d get up, go to school. After school, you’d have sports. Tutoring. Dinner. Practice piano. Do homework. Lights out at midnight. Wake up. Do it again.
Weekends didn’t have school but were somehow filled with homework, sports, and friends.
When you got to college, you got away from your parents but college life was pretty structured. Get up. Go to class. In between classes go to library and do work. Exercise at gym. Dinner. Hang out with friends. Dorm party. Repeat.
Then you graduated.
WHOO HOO! Out in the real world!
No more school! Making money!
FREEDOM!
At first it felt awesome. To be free. All grown up.
Then as months and years went by, it started not feeling that great.
Work is OK. But when you got home, more and more you wonder what you should do.
And why you’re doing it.
Watching Netflix didn’t have the same appeal. Hanging out with friends? Fun, but still something missing. Hobbies? Activities? Sometimes. But nothing feels all that great. No…something – purpose? Fulfillment? Joy?
One day you realize that all your life up to now, someone else was telling you what to do and you went along, enjoying the lack of need of stressing about yourself.
Thank your parents for taking on that stress!
However, they aren’t here any more. Only YOU.
And the one thing they left out in getting you here was…
NOBODY NEVER TAUGHT YOU HOW TO THINK FOR YOURSELF.
All is not lost.
I have met many clients in coaching who show up in this situation. They had their lives extremely orchestrated and over-scheduled by others who cared a lot about who they would become…maybe a bit too much.
We first realize what happened. Then we go on a journey to teach them how to get to know themselves fully and then, design a fulfilling, rewarding life that integrates both work and personal life. We take that into a plan going forward, and add in whatever life skills need to be bolstered, removing whatever blocks and barriers they might have to moving forward.
Awareness, discovery, with a dash of structure and desire, takes them on the path to fully maturing as a fully independent adult.
What was your life like growing up? Was your life extremely regimented? And how did you feel after you graduated from college and entered the work force?
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